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About Traditional Art / Hobbyist Member Mary-Anne LeslieFemale/United States Group :iconworld-of-art-lovers: World-Of-Art-Lovers
If you have art, you have love.
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To those of you who indulged my little breakdown the other day, thanks again. Even Abigail wrote me with words of encouragement. Cementing herself as my heroine. 
I was browsing through Pinterest and saw a bunch of her work someone had pinned. I calmly realized they were just perfection. I laughed at the fact I even dared to compare our abilities! I am simply not at that level of adeptness! And we have similar tastes which is probably why I've been fixated on her work lately. She creates the things I've always wanted to make myself, but can't seem to quite translate from mind to matter. I looked at these pieces and my eye didn't snag anywhere. They are flawless and gloriously consistent! Somehow it is very comforting to realize it, that I haven't failed myself through lack of trying, I'm just not at that skill level yet. I'm close I think, to whatever my height of ability is, so I will keep plodding on and enjoy the journey. And if I only ever am a hobbyist, at least I won't ever have to endure the stress of a deadline, or of organizing a show, or traveling out of state to exhibit. I might even be too lazy for that lifestyle. Maybe I would rather live vicariously through hers. My ego would thoroughly enjoy it, but for now I have killed it. 
Which brings me to a beautiful article I read today about Van Goghs letters to his brother attempting to explain why he can't live like other people and how he was drawn to painting, and battling feelings of uselessness and accusations of laziness. I related so hard to it.
One fine day I hope to be able to say this :"One who has been rolling along for ages as if tossed on a stormy sea arrives at his destination at last; one who has seemed good for nothing, incapable of filling any position, any role, finds one in the end, and, active and capable of action, shows himself entirely differently from what he had seemed at first sight."
  • Mood: Hope
  • Reading: Man Up by Ross Mathews
  • Drinking: Tea
Sometimes I seriously consider giving up. I'm old and haven't accomplished anything to speak of. I thought I was good at this. Why doesn't anyone offer me money to do what I'm good at? I have always thought it was my reason to exist. I realize I sound like a petulant brat but dammit I was always the best in school at art, in college I was one of the more skilled handful. Now I've dwindled into obscurity. I really shouldn't browse around on here, because I see art by people like Abigail Larson who appears to actually be making a living at it. I thought I was close to her sphere of skill. Maybe I'm completely delusional, maybe everything I do is garbage. It doesn't seem to elicit much excitement. Or do I just stink at self promotion? Or is my style only appealing to a small group? She's so young too! 26!! I don't even want to tell you how old I am. 
It's not a race or an age contest. But maybe I have to stop fooling myself. I have never understood how anyone takes off in this biz. I should probably take my work to some galleries and ask if they will exhibit my little pen drawings. I'm so sure they'll turn me down I can't bear to try. 
I don't know what I expected out of life but apparently I was waiting for the God of Illustration to descend from the skies and shower me with accolades. 
Im heartbroken and discouraged. I'm a fraud, I've listed myself as a professional illustrator when in reality I haven't made enough money from it even to be taxed. I wish I didn't have these lofty aspirations, I don't know where I got the idea I could make a career out of my doodles. Damn my stupid ego. But thank you for reading if you made it this far. I can't vent to people I know IRL about this I'm too ashamed, and I know many of you have felt an artist's frustration. 
  • Mood: Hopeless
  • Reading: Longbourn
  • Watching: life pass me by
  • Drinking: Whine
Mother of Dragons by Maryanneleslie
Mother of Dragons
"The cream-and-gold dragon was suckling at her right breast, the green-and-bronze at the left. Her arms cradled them close. The black-and-scarlet beast was draped across her shoulders, it's long sinuous neck coiled under her chin."
~George R R Martin, 'A Game of Thrones'

When I read this part of the book I was struck by it. It drives further the fact that she is truly the Mother of Dragons in every sense and they are that precious to her. Don't know why they didn't depict it accurately in the show. But all her hair burned off in the book too, and I just had to leave it in. You know I loves to draw me some hair.
I wanted to draw her like those medieval paintings of saints you'd see in a cathedral. Hence the moon behind her as a sort of halo.
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As in classic simpsons episodes. Obviously the best episode ever was Cape Feare. I Haven't given all that much thought to this but I suspect "Itchy and Scratchy Land" is in the top five. I'm watching it now and laughing. And sadly you guys are the first people I thought of. Everyone on facebook is sick of my nonsense. I suspect they have become grownups. Poor bastards. 
If you'd like to try something Christmasey, my new obsession is Bigelow's "Constant Coment" lotsa cloves. 
That is all.
  • Mood: Alienated
  • Reading: The Turn of the Screw
  • Watching: The Simpsons season four
  • Drinking: Constant Comment tea
To those of you who indulged my little breakdown the other day, thanks again. Even Abigail wrote me with words of encouragement. Cementing herself as my heroine. 
I was browsing through Pinterest and saw a bunch of her work someone had pinned. I calmly realized they were just perfection. I laughed at the fact I even dared to compare our abilities! I am simply not at that level of adeptness! And we have similar tastes which is probably why I've been fixated on her work lately. She creates the things I've always wanted to make myself, but can't seem to quite translate from mind to matter. I looked at these pieces and my eye didn't snag anywhere. They are flawless and gloriously consistent! Somehow it is very comforting to realize it, that I haven't failed myself through lack of trying, I'm just not at that skill level yet. I'm close I think, to whatever my height of ability is, so I will keep plodding on and enjoy the journey. And if I only ever am a hobbyist, at least I won't ever have to endure the stress of a deadline, or of organizing a show, or traveling out of state to exhibit. I might even be too lazy for that lifestyle. Maybe I would rather live vicariously through hers. My ego would thoroughly enjoy it, but for now I have killed it. 
Which brings me to a beautiful article I read today about Van Goghs letters to his brother attempting to explain why he can't live like other people and how he was drawn to painting, and battling feelings of uselessness and accusations of laziness. I related so hard to it.
One fine day I hope to be able to say this :"One who has been rolling along for ages as if tossed on a stormy sea arrives at his destination at last; one who has seemed good for nothing, incapable of filling any position, any role, finds one in the end, and, active and capable of action, shows himself entirely differently from what he had seemed at first sight."
  • Mood: Hope
  • Reading: Man Up by Ross Mathews
  • Drinking: Tea

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Maryanneleslie's Profile Picture
Maryanneleslie
Mary-Anne Leslie
Artist | Hobbyist | Traditional Art
United States
Mary-Anne has had a passion for drawing ever since she could hold a pencil. After receiving an art scholarship in high school, she earned degrees in illustration and classical animation at Capilano University in her hometown of Vancouver. Mary-Anne's style evokes her love for the clean, delicate lines of an animation cel or a stained glass window, accented with lacy washes of color. Her art reflects elements of vintage storybook illustration, animation, art nouveau and graphic design. Mary-Anne has exhibited her art at galleries in Vancouver, and illustrated a book of children's poems for the government of Canada, among other projects.
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:iconterrizae:
Terrizae Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2014  Professional General Artist
Nice gallery, I look forward to seeing more! :)
Reply
:iconebolabearvomit:
EbolaBearVomit Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2014
I found another print option
www.magcloud.com/

I like Ka-Blam for their versatility
on small orders.
I like print ninja for large orders.

Magcloud looks interesting because they give you digital options. Their printed costs kinda suck.
Reply
:iconmaryanneleslie:
Maryanneleslie Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Nice! Thank you! ^_^
Reply
:iconcid-alderlaine:
Cid-Alderlaine Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2014
Happy Birthday, Champ~!
Reply
:icondaeien:
daeien Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2014
Happy Birthday! :D :party: :cake: :party: :D
Reply
:icongryffgirl:
Gryffgirl Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2014
Happy birthday! :cake:
Reply
:iconmitsukishinobi:
Mitsukishinobi Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2014
Otanjoubi omedetou gozaimasu ^^ Party

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Reply
:icons-carter:
s-carter Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
A Very Happy Birthday to you, my friend! :la:

I hope you have a fantastic day and night planned ahead!  :boogie:

:cake::party::cake:
Reply
:iconsophiethewolfwrath:
Sophiethewolfwrath Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Happy Birthday ^^ :) (Smile) :D (Big Grin) Meow :3 Love Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart Heart 
Reply
:iconinkyrose:
InkyRose Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Happy Birthday- have a great day! :D
Reply
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